Sunday, February 17, 2013

The Boob Tube

I have many reasons to believe Tivo was developed by parents.  What did society do before Tivo existed?  Go insane?  I just can't imagine being a parent without it.  Not only do we get to watch our tv shows without interruption, we can plop the kids down at any given moment when we need a little downtime.

Back when I was a kid, we only got cartoons on Saturday morning.  I bet my parents lived for those free moments, when my sister and I were glued to the Smurfs and Scooby Doo.  Kids' programming for a few hours once a week should have been considered parent abuse in 1979.  PBS did offer Sesame Street, 321 Contact, and Mr. Rogers everyday, but those re-runs would only go so far.

Before having kids, I bought into the whole "limit your kids' tv time to so many hours per week" crap.  I swore my kids would be learning from books, not from Barney.  HA!!

Confession kids watch tv at least 2 hours a day*.  And, guess what?  I don't feel guilty or embarrassed to admit that.  In fact, it is those precious, calm moments that keep me sane.  Plop Haley in front of Max and Ruby with a sippy cup of milk, and mom instantly gets to check Facebook do laundry.

So, in the spirit of "educational programming", I wanted to give a rundown of all the kids' shows poor Bryon and I have become way more familiar with than we ever imagined. 

1.  Octonauts.  Okay, so this one isn't the most annoying thing on Disney Jr.  In fact, I kind of like the "Creature Report" at the end of every episode that gives facts on marine animals.  Although, I can never tell if they are singing, "Creature Alert" or "Creature Report."

The Gup-E.  Get it?

2.  Doc McStuffins.  Probably the best female character Disney has created EVER.  This little adorable black girl cures all the toys' ailments in the neighborhood.  Such a better role model than that needy Sleeping Beauty!

No prince needed here!

3.  Max and Ruby.  I hate this show.  Ruby is the most nagging animated creature I've ever seen.  Of course this is the only show Haley ever asks to watch.  She does it just to drive me crazy! 

Ruby doing what she does best...nag Max

4.  Poppy Cat.  I've never actually watched a full minute of this one.  I hope it is teaching good behavior.  For all I know, Poppy Cat is growing poppies for her own personal narcotic addiction.  The only thing I do know about this show is that Bryon has taught the girls to make silly clicking noises during the opening song.  It's amusing to listen to while chccking pinterest doing laundry. 

To the poppy fields?
 I realize these confessions will probably put me out of the running for Mother-of-the-Year, but that is a risk I'm willing to take.

*Okay, it is probably closer to 3, but who's counting??

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