How to Carve a Pumpkin in Three Easy Steps
1. Line the floor with a plastic trashbag and let the kids scrape out all the nasty insides from the pumpkin.
2. Marry an engineer who is a perfectionist and is also handy with tools. While said husband is carving, do your best to keep kids away from sharp tools.
3. Place candle inside your jack-o-lantern and shower said husband with lots of praise, all the while thanking your lucky stars you didn't have to carve a thing!